10 week Challenge

So as many of my readers know I started a 10 week challenge with a personal trainer and nutrition plan. At the end of 10wks I only lost 10lbs which I was really disappointed in, but I did lose a total of 9 inches. 5 inches from my waist, 1 inch from my thigh, 1/2 from my calf, 1/2 from my arm and 2 from my hips. Which I do have to be impressed with even with my lack of a high number of lbs.

I have been getting really discouraged the last two weeks. I have not been watching my points and I have not been motivated to go to the gym. Sometimes I feel that just being fat would be so much easier. I have been at this for almost 4 months and only have 10lbs lost, its so discouraging.

Wish I could be more positive at the moment, but that is all I have.

About ME!

Age: 26. 27 in June
Bed Size: Cal King. I have a German Shepherd and husband who dont know how to sleep on their half.
Chore You Hate: All of them. Mostly gardening or picking up dog poop, oh and folding laundry!
Dogs: Yep, just 1
Essential Start of Your Day: hitting the snooze alarm at least 3 times
Favorite Color: Pink
Gold or Silver: Silver
Height: 5'8"
Instruments I Play: None now. I used to play violin
Job Title: Human Resources Coordinator, CA Region
Kids: None
Live: Bay Area, CA
Mom's Name: Tami
Nicknames: Nunu, Noni.
Overnight Hospital Stays: 4ish. I had breast reduction surgery and didn't move around after surgery, developed a blood clot in my lung and pneumonia in the the other. MOVE PEOPLE, MOVE!!!
Pet Peeve: Loud breathing, toothpaste in the sink, annoying people, slow walkers...I am a pretty irritable person, lol
Right or Left Handed: Right
Siblings: 2 step brothers, both older
Time You Wake Up: First alarm goes off at 5:50am, I finally roll out of bed at 6:15am
Underwear: I am cheap, I wear thongs from Target.
Veggie You Dislike: all I only eat salad :( What Makes You Run Late: sleep, or my husband, he is always late!!
X-Rays You Have Had: my knee, back, and wrist
Yummy Food You Make: Chicken or Pork Scallopini, Chipotle Mac n Cheese, I can make a mean grilled cheese.
Zoo Animal You Like Best: big cats (lions, tigers, pumas)

New Last Name

Oh I cant believe I forgot....

I FINALLY CHANGED MY LAST NAME!!! I am "officially" married, lol. I am only 6 months late, my wave of feminism was squashed when my husband finally gave me the look.

Blah

So I feel like such a slacker when it comes to posting. I am never good at this whole thing. With dieting I keep feeling like I am hitting a brick wall, but I am happy to admit that this self-proclaimed, extremely picky eater as opened up her repertoire of food even more the last few weeks. This is my first time attempting at meatless Fridays for Lent, my husband is Catholic--I am not. In past years I would eat my juicy burger in front of him without an ounce of guilt; however, this year I thought I would give up meat for dinners for Fridays. Which I know for some people you think REALLY?? Thats not hard, but 99.9% of my dinners consist of chicken and some sort of fruit. So two weeks ago I tried Morning Star Chickn Patties, which weren't that bad and the Points+ value was only 4 so not horrible for a breaded fake chicken patty. It didn't taste bad! A year ago I wouldn't have even thought of tasting it, let alone eating 2 patties. It tasted like a bland chicken nugget, so I would definitely add seasoning or some kind of sauce to spice it up.
So tonight I tasted Boca Burgers, these were actually REALLLLYYY good, much better than the Morning Star and even tasted like beef. So I am definitely proud of my willingness to try new things lately.
As for the gym I have really slacked these last 3 days and not gone and just laid in bed after work. It has been pouring down rain here in the Bay Area, CA and has definitely made me not want to do anything, let alone try and run and the gym. So I feel like a total slacker and a downward spiral. I feel like a slacker so I slack by not going making me feel like more of a slacker... But I feel really proud of myself in my strength. My personal trainer had us do a 300 workout and I was amazed that I could do push-ups and box jumps. I was so scared to even attempt to jump on the box, but my trainer held my hand lol and I did it. Shocked myself.

For this weekend it is my husband's best friend's fiance's bachelorette party. We are going to Napa and going wine tasting. I am really torn about the whole experience, I really don't want to drive Napa, let alone drink extra calories in wine which will lead to me snacking and inevitably eating some crap I really shouldn't. UGH what we do for friends, this is going to take a lot of willpower.

Another note, my best friend is almost 6 months pregnant and we just found out that Matt's long time friend for Catholic school is also pregnant. I have definitely been hearing my biological clock ticking a lot louder. I find myself searching at Nursery room themes and furniture and then I freak out about the cost of a baby and wonder if its ever going to work. Another thing that freaks me out and I feel horrible for saying, is that I am putting so much work into losing weight and while as slow as it is it makes me appreciate all the hard work even more. A baby is just going to add more weight I am afraid of becoming "fat" once again..

So yes I may not have been posting but there has a lot been going on in my life. On a "lighter" note I am officially down 11.6lbs to a 231.4. I am afraid to weigh in tomorrow as like I mentioned above I haven't been working out to much and I think I could have incorporated more fruit into my diet this week, but I am determined to start fresh on Sunday; even though I will be missing my weigh in  tomorrow.

Weigh In Day- 232.6

So I lost 1.4lbs. I finally hit my 10lbs! But at the same time I am upset that it wasn't more. How do you guys get over that feeling of that's a good loss but still upset? And reading all of your blogs and seeing people have lost 50-60 pounds that seems like a year away i just wanna cry Why can't I just weigh in one week and it say -10 lbs? While I totally understand the concept of this being a lifestyle change and I don't plan on ever going back to the way I was eating I just wish I could see the positive benefits sooner.

Weigh In Day- 232.6

So I lost 1.4lbs. I finally hit my 10lbs! But at the same time I am upset that it wasn't more. How do you guys get over that feeling of that's a good loss but still upset? And reading all of your blogs and seeing people have lost 50-60 pounds that seems like a year away i just wanna cry Why can't I just weigh in one week and it say -10 lbs? While I totally understand the concept of this being a lifestyle change and I don't plan on ever going back to the way I was eating I just wish I could see the positive benefits sooner.

Weigh In Day- 233.6

So I lost 1.4lbs. I finally hit my 10lbs! But at the same time I am upset that it wasn't more. How do you guys get over that feeling of that's a good loss but still upset? And reading all of your blogs and seeing people have lost 50-60 pounds that seems like a year away i just wanna cry Why can't I just weigh in one week and it say -10 lbs? While I totally understand the concept of this being a lifestyle change and I don't plan on ever going back to the way I was eating I just wish I could see the positive benefits sooner.

Chipotle Mac n Cheese

Well as some of you re aware today was Ash Wednesday the beginning of Lent. What this means for me (being the good wife I am) with my husband being Catholic this means I need to find LOWFAT veggie dishes for Fridays and of course today. With both of us not liking fish and me hating every vegetable this can tend to be a bit difficult, I can only eat quesadillas and rice so much before I wanna run into a wall.

So tonight I made Low Fat Chipotle Mac n' Cheese. It actually turned out really good wish I would have taken some pictures for you. Here is the recipe..

Ingredients

• 1  (1-ounce) slice white bread
• 1/3  cup  all-purpose flour
• 4  cups  fat-free milk
• 1/4  cup  (1 ounce) grated fresh Parmesan cheese, divided
• 1  cup  (4 ounces) shredded reduced-fat sharp cheddar cheese
• 1/2  cup  (2 ounces) shredded Monterey Jack cheese
• 1  tablespoon  Dijon mustard
• 1/2  teaspoon  salt
• 2  drained canned chipotle chiles in adobo sauce, seeded and chopped
• 8  cups  hot cooked cavatappi (about 5 cups uncooked pasta)
• Cooking spray

Preparation

Preheat oven to 375°.

Place bread in a food processor, pulse until coarse crumbs form to measure 1/2 cup; set aside.

Lightly spoon flour into a dry measuring cup, and level with a knife. Place flour in a large saucepan. Gradually add milk, stirring constantly with a whisk. Bring to a boil; reduce heat, and simmer mixture for 2 minutes or until thick. Remove from heat; stir in 2 tablespoons Parmesan and the next 5 ingredients (2 tablespoons Parmesan through chipotle chiles), stirring until cheese melts. Combine cheese sauce and pasta in a bowl.

Spoon the mixture into a 13 x 9-inch baking dish coated with cooking spray. Combine 2 tablespoons remaining Parmesan and breadcrumbs; sprinkle over pasta mixture. Cover and bake at 375° for 10 minutes. Uncover and bake for an additional 10 minutes or until mixture is bubbly.

Note: To make ahead, assemble casserole as directed, but stop before adding breadcrumb topping. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Let stand 30 minutes at room temperature; sprinkle with breadcrumb topping, and bake as directed.

Nutritional Information

PointsPlus= 8

Calories: 328

Fat:7.3g (sat 3.8g,mono 2g,poly 0.6g)

Protein:17.7g

Carbohydrate:46g

Fiber:1.8g

Cholesterol:20mg

Iron:2.4mg

Sodium:638mg

Calcium: 415mg

30 Days of Me- Day 13 and 14

Day 13- a picture of your favorite band or artist.
This one is hard I typically listen to the radio so I dont really have one favorite band, but just whatever is popular at the time. So hear are some of my favorite songs I listen to on my Ipod at the gym.

Day 14- a picture of someone you couldnt live without.

I have tried to leve my hubby out of pictures to show diversity, BUT I just couldnt leave him out of this one.

Weigh In- 234

I meant to post this on Saturday, but it seems it didnt go through

So today was my weigh in day.... I gained .4lbs not bad after a week and 1/2 of vacation and eating alot of crappy food. I am determined to at least hit my 10lb mark which is .6lbs which should be easy. I really want my 10lb goal of a mani/pedi I cant believe how long it has taken!! I would love to lose 3lbs and get my 5% at the same time, but I dont want to set myself up for disappointment.

My trainer this week killed me; my thighs and back are still screaming at me from Monday, and we only have three more workouts with him. It is slightly bittersweet, I am looking forward to a break from my Monday night beatings, but he also said the workouts are going to get harder :(. Hubby and I decided that we are going to do another 10wk program like this for the summer, it starts in May. He has me running on the treadmill now instead of my favorite elliptical so I am not to thrilled about my workouts this week, but I'm going to do them.

I measured myself this week as well and originally I was really sad because I thought I hadnt lost any inches and I was wondering how that was possible when my clothes were fitting better, but I had the wrong original measurement! I have lost 3" inches from my waist 1" from my arms, 1" from my thigh and 1 1/2" from my chest... so that definitely made me feel a little better.

XOXO....

Day 10, 11, and 12

I thought I would do a few of my 30 days of me, because I know I am way over the 30 days, but I didnt think it would be that fun to do Day 10-30 in one blog.

So Day 10- a picture of the person who you do the craziest things with

This is one of my best friends, Julianna. She is definitely crazy and that is an understatement. Amazing personality and brings out my fun, crazy, child side.











Day 11- A picture of something you hate.

I HATE SOUP!!! Actually I hate all liquid foods, they seriously make me gag. Melty ice cream or when my smoothies sit too long, creamy sauces.... YUCK. Pls I have this adverse reaction to green foods. I just started eating salad less than a year ago.










Day 12- A picture of something you love.
Aside from my husband and my dog of course....

I love shopping, I admittedly have a problem. Torrid definitely has a special place in my heart.

Really Behind and Nervous

Hi Everyone I really missed you all, I hate alot of reading and writing to catch up on.

So I went on vacation to visit my mother in Lake Havasu, Arizona. It was really great to get away from everything for 2 weeks, but apparently I left my diet at home. We did find a gym there so I was able to workout for the week, but I definitely didnt eat as healthy as I could/should have. So we will see how bad it hit me tomorrow morning when I weigh in.
This week hasnt been that great either, I have been doing much better with the food choices since we got back in town; however, my gym regime has been lacking. I have just been tired and worn out.

Part of my vacation demise.... and no it was not shared with 4 people, they just have to serve it with 4 straws.

We went to this little town called Oatman where the burros run wild, but you an buy food and feed them so they are pretty much domesticated and SUPER cute :)











So everyone keep your fingers your fingers crossed, think light, send good vibes and all that jazz

XOXO

Weigh In Day- 233.6

So I walked in feeling really good about my weight loss this week I was really hoping for 2.2lbs and I thought I would hit it but I hit 1.8 loss. Which is still good by all means but I reallllyy wanted my 2.2 I want my Mani/pedi dammit! Haha so now I am .4lbs away from 10lbs it feels like it's taking forever!

Anyways so there is this guy at work and he is doing the Optifast diet through Kaiser. It is a strict diet plan full of only their shakes and bars and they are not allowed any other food. He definitely needs to be on some sort of diet and at least this is medically supervised; however, everyday at work he is eating some food that was found in the breakroom. Chinese, truffles, cookies, etc. I hate to say it, but I get disgusted. How can you eat that much, one and two you are supposed to be dieting!!!! I know it's so horrible of me to say and I wonder if people feel the same way about me when I decide to have a small piece of candy or French fries? Why do such a strict diet if you can't stick to it? What happens when the program is over? He hasn't fixed any of his food addiction problems or learned how to eat in the world. Bah maybe it's the PMS. Lol

Well I hope everyone is doing great on their journeys and good luck!!!

30 Days of Me- Day 9

Day 9- A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most:

My best friend Kristin I have known her for almost 7 years and she has definitely had my back through my ups downs, she is amazing. My husband is definitely a close runner up for this spot, but since I have known this girl almost quadruple the amount of time I have known my husband she takes the lead. Plus I think she has seen me cry more lol.

As for today it is Superbowl Sunday and I definitely keeping my fingers crossed that I do not go off the deep end today. I tried to fill my house with healthy food or lowfat versions of the typical superbowl fare, so we will see. I am sure Joe (my personal trainer) is going to kill us tomorrow to make us all regret today...

Here is to another week of not being able to feel my legs!!

Weigh In Day- 235.4

Oh ya I lost 4.4 lbs this week!!! I am super excited especially after a 1 lb gain last week, but of course my brain automatically derails to "how much of this weight loss was my hard work? And how much of me being sick and not really eating come into play?" So I am nervous that next week will reflect a gain to normalize this week. Ugh I just wish I could be happy about it and not immediately self depricate. Well I hope this is for real and I hope I don't start to think that I can "afford" to eat a bacon ultimate cheeseburger from Jack n the Box.

So is anyone doing anything for Super Bowl? I am getting my cardio in early on both days in effort to kick this snack filled weekend in the ass. I bought a veggie tray, cheese and meat, and a spinach dip. We are making our own personalized pizza so I can control the fat and I am also making a low fat cheesecake I saw on Gina's Skinny Taste website. I am hoping by keeping the items lower in fat if I do overindulge a bit at least there is no guessing on the point values when I made it :)

Love you all keep up the great work

30 days of Me- Day 8

My dearest mother she can always make me laugh!!!

Sorry so short today I can only breathe out of one nostril :(

30 Days of Me- Day 7

I feel bad I have been so off with these I should be on Day 8 I think, but I have been so sick and Monday was my first day with my personal trainer and today, 4 days later, I can finally walk again. The last few days I just wanted to lay in bed in a ball. I am not looking forward to next Monday, I am scared. He has me doing some workouts that are impossible for me-- assisted dips, pull ups...did he not see how much I weigh?? And he wants me to do 3 reps of 15?? I CANT EVEN DO 1!!! Ugh. Plus my cardio workouts have been sucking because I hae been so sick I cant even breathe.


Day 7-a picture of my most treasured item.
Well since my husband isnt technically an item I guess I cant put him up and that would eliminate my doggy too. Soo hmmm here it is:

This is Lester, he is manatee. My mom got him for me when my first boyfriend broke up with me when I was 15, 11 years later he is still with me. The story is we went to Florida and I saw a stuffed manatee when we landed, but I figured I would buy him when we returned so I didnt have to carry him around everywhere, well I looked everywhere for a stuffed manatee in Florida for two weeks while we were there and could never find one. But my mom is one of those thoughtful people who remember things years later and she must have found one. So there he is, I cant even imagine how many tears this poor stuffed animal has gone through...

30 Days of Me- Day 5 and 6

I am a little behind so I decided to combine Day 5 and Day 6

Day 5- A picture of my favorite memory. Of course would be wedding day...

Day 6- Who would you want to change lives with for the day?

I am not sure there is anyone I would want to change lives with. Do I want more money? YES Do I want to weigh less- YES Do I want kids? YES Do I want a personal chef? YES Do I want a personal driver? YES Do i want a nanny eventually? YES

But I would like all of this and be me!!

30 Days of me- Day 4

My husband works graveyard and every other weekend, so most of my weeknights (after the gym and cooking dinner) look much like this:

Doggy and I finally getting to relax. I had a really crappy day, I went to my weightwatcher meeting and GAINED a whole freaking lb. Not a 1/2 lb or a few ounces, but a whole freaking pound!! I have no idea how that happened I have been eating my points and exercising my butt off. Its times like this that make me wonder if it worth it sometimes. I shouldn't be getting this discouraged in the beginning, but its not like I fell off the wagon last week, I just felt like that pound was totally undeserved. However, I still dragged my ass to the gym after my meeting and then did my weekly grocery shopping. I baked some lowfat red velvet cupcakes and that seemed to take up some of my time which was nice, but I am still very disappointed.

Oh well, new week right??

30 Days of Me- Day 3

A picture of the cast of your favorite TV show:

I told you I have a secret love affair with teeny-bopper shows!! I love them I am addicted to so many more like CSI, NCIS, Criminal Minds, Greek, Blue Bloods, way too much TV. Thank God for DVR or I would never leave the house lol.


Last night was a good gym night. I was a little disappointed being thrown off my routine, but I was able to work out harder after giving my muscles a break from the beating my personal trainer has written out. So I am off again today and this weekend to bust my butt and this Monday he will give us another weekly workout routine. My emotions waiver between being really excited at what I am doing and just tired of the hardwork. Thankfully I have the support of my loving husband who makes me not want to come home after skipping a workout for fear that he will lose more weight than me. HAHA!!

30 Days of Me- Day 2

This was taken almost 6 months ago with my mom and I at my Bridal Shower. She moved to AZ about 5 years ago and we still talk every day and I can tell her anything. I am actually preparing to go see her for a week in February for her birthday and mini vacation. I cant wait to be off work and relax, ahh dreams....

As for my journey, I cant believe January is almost over. This week has been kind rough for me, I think I drank all my spare my points on Saturday at the hockey game and then the day of my first personal trainer appointment I was so tired all I wanted to do was run to Jack n' the Box, and that I did! I took off 2 days already from the gym, which means I HAVE to go on Friday, my normal day off. Well hopefully it all pays off on Saturday.

30 Days of Me!

I've decided to go along with the crowd and join in on the 30 Day Photo thing. It looks like a ton of fun!! If you're not familiar, you just post a picture each day that goes along with a certain topic.1. A picture of yourself along with 15 Topics.
2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest
3. A picture of the cast of your favorite show
4. A picture of your night
5. A picture of your favorite memory
6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day
7. A picture of most treasured item
8. A picture that makes you laugh
9. A picture of a person who has gotten you through the most
10. A picture of the person you do the craziest things with
11. A picture of something you hate
12. A picture of something you love
13. A picture of your favorite band or artist
14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
15. A picture of something you want to do before you die
16. A picture of someone who inspires you
17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
18. A picture of your biggest insecurity
19. A picture of you when you were little
20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
21. A picture of something you wish you could forget
22. A picture of something you wish you were better at
23. A picture of your favourite book
24. A picture of something you wish you could change
25. A picture of your day
26. A picture of something that means a lot to you
27. A picture of yourself and a family member
28. A picture of something your afraid of
29. A picture that can always make you smile
30. A picture of someone you missHopefully with this, you guys can get to know me a little better.

DAY 1

1. I am my mom's only child, but I have 3 step brothers
2. I am obsessed with the color pink
3. I have over 75 different MAC eyeshadows
4. I have been engaged twice
5. I just got married September 18, 2010
6. I haven't changed my last yet, because I have individuality issues.
7. I have control issues
8. I love cold french fries
9. I could put buffalo sauce on anything
10. I graduated high school early
11. My favorite thing on Saturdays is laying in bed and catching up on "smut" TV. Real Housewives, Jerseylicious, Greek, Hellcats, etc...
12. My current fear is being able to be financially stable enough to have a child
13. My mom is my best friend
14. I have a love/hate relationship with shoes
15. As much as I say my husband is spoiled, he deserves it all. He cooks, he cleans, he works all night and does everything around the house. So yes he deserves his motorcycle, but dont tell anyone....

Stylish Blogger Award

I was so excited to receive the Stylish Blogger Award from Tee of http://downsizediva-newme.blogspot.com/. It is a great blog and I feel honored to have her give it to me :) So here are the rules...
1. Post and link back to the person who awarded you this award
2. Share 7 things about yourself
3. Award 15 recently discovered great bloggers (or as many as you can)
4. Contact these bloggers and tell them they've won.

Seven Things About Me:
1. I have a German Shepherd, Cali- who is my husband and I's child for now

2. I am OCD about my closet-- it is in color order by sleeve length
3. I am the PICKIEST person on food ever-- I dont eat veggies and just started eating salad last year
4. As much as I complain about my job, I love what I do and am happy that I'm doing something I went to school for.
5. I have a secret addiction to teeny-bopper shows and basically anything on ABC Family
6. I love Valentine's Day more than Xmas because I love seeing all the PINK
7. I have a hard time processing real emotions and in turn make a joke out of everything--people say I am like a guy.

BLOGS!!!
- http://wolfpackchick10.blogspot.com/ -- Thinspiration
- http://dietchiconamission.blogspot.com/
- http://ariathel.blogspot.com/ -- Half of myself
- http://www.plumpnonfiction.blogspot.com/ -- Plump Non Fiction

Challenge

I have recently been inspired by dietchiconamission's blog and how far she has come running 5k's. So I have decided to follow the C25k.com, it seems to have great results with people and they even have a Facebook page. The Couch 2 5k is a nine week program whose idea is transforming couch potatoes into runners. I figure if this program works for me than it can definitely work for EVERYONE. I am not the type of person to run, I still curse the person who thought it would be fun to just run for the heck of it. If someone is not chasing me, wielding some kind of weapon, I really don't see the point in running. However, I really want to be fit and enjoy running and it is so great for your body, health, etc. So here I am; I joined their facebook page and printed out the program, I even went as far as buying the IPhone app, which is really geat because it allows you to play your music and has verbal cues to tell you when to run and walk.

Yesterday was the first day I started the program and while it was tough, it was definitely not unbearable. The first week consists of sarting off with a 5min walk and then walking for 90secs and running for 60secs and you do this for 30mins. I completed it and felt very proud of myself and my thighs are SO sore this am. I wanted to try again today, but I start our Physical Training program tomorrow and didnt want to be in pain while getting my butt whooped.

So more to come!!!

Weigh In Day- 238.8

I realized as I was updating my signature to say "good bye 240's" that last year this time I was saying goodbye 220's. Rather than feeling accomplished at losing 2.2bs I found myself beating myself up. It's hard sometimes when you realize how many times you have tried and failed. I feel really optimistic about this this time, but it is still in the back of my head that I am going to fail.

Anyways on a lighter note I lost another 2.2 that brings me to 238.8. Which is a great accomplishment, I just need to get over the disappointment each time I get on the scale. This is a great loss and I should be super excited, but part of me can't help, but think why not more? I got 52 activity points, I didnt touch my spare points why didn't I see a bigger loss? I know its not going to be an easy journey, but I don't understand why it is so hard sometimes. Part of me wonders if I wasnt working out would I lose the same? I have never worked out this hard in my life and had I weight loss just the same....

Happy mood time--- I am down 4.4lbs, which is great. My husband and I also start our 10wk personal trainer/nutrition class on tomorrow!! EEEKKK. I find that he is definitely more supportive and seems to want to follow the program for himself now and he is doing great, he says he is down 7lbs! I am so happy for him and also want to punch him in the face at the same time!! lol

Good Luck Everyone!!

Day 19- Emotions..

So I am finding this process easier and easier. When I was younger dieting was very difficult because my food groups consisted of burgers and fries and of course sweets. I actually eat salads now and when I am starving and would order buffalo wings and cheese sticks to start I order a salad and find myself satisfied.

I have been working out at the gym and I am really enjoying it. I racked up 39 activity points since Saturday!! This is amazing for me coming from someone who would lay in bed all weekend. I am actually excited to get on the scale on Saturday, I really want to cheat and jump on early and see how I am doing, but I dont want it to sway my emotions in either direction.

Speaking of cheating... I have really been craving pizza. So I am thinking of sharing a little bit with the husband so I dont go overboard later. I love the Points+ program because it allows you to a what you want and not feel like you are starving yourself.

Nothing is worth having if you are not fighting for it.

Bean Brownies?? :P

So I heard about these Bean Brownie things a few months ago when I was doing the South Beach Diet and since they have so much protein they were suggested as a good low carb dessert. However, I HATE HATE HATE beans. Did you ge that everyone I HATE beans, they make me want to gag, the smell, the look, the taste, everything. So there was no way in HELL I was going to try bean brownies. How dare someone even thinkng of adding beans to my heavenly, never done anything wrong to you brownies. So months later here I am making freaking bean brownies in attempts to satisfy my brownie craving in a hopefully a much healthier alternative.

I included the recipe below from Gina's website http://www.skinnytaste.com/

Black Bean Brownies
Servings: 20 servings • Serving Size: 1 brownie • Calories: 194 • Points: 2 ww points

• 1 can (15 oz.) black beans
• 1 box brownie mix

Open can of beans, drain and rinse well. Put beans back in the can and fill can with water. Put beans and water in blender until smooth. Mix pureed beans with brownie package mix. DO NOT add eggs or oil. Spray baking dish with Pam. Cook brownies according to package directions. Cool and serve.

Adding the bean puree to my brownies.

Brownie Mix in the pan and a picture of the mix I used

 So if you despise beans as much as I do I dont advise taking a big whiff of the mixutre inside the blender once you pull the lid off. YUCK. I also LOVE LOVE LOVE brownie mix to me eating the mix is more special then the actual baked brownie. However I was extremely nervous to taste the mix, but I did.... I could taste the beans!! I almost threw out the mix right then and there, but I trudged on. They actually look amazing and smelled even better coming out of the oven and the taste... they are heavenly they are much more dense and heavy, due to the lack of eggs but you can't tell the difference. I suggest you all try them!!

I am also on to make pumpkin butter today...

Day 14- 241 lbs

So I had my first weigh in after being on Weight Watchers again and I am down 2.2lbs!!! It felt really great and I hope to keep up the good work. I have been going to the gym now for 2 weeks and I find the strength growing in my arms and the weights getting a little easier, so now it's time to push myself a little harder.  However, I do truly feel old my hip is hurting from working out and I feel like an old lady hobbling around.

I got into a fight with the husband the other day, he has been trying to support me and is even counting points himself. However, only after a week of eating healthy he is OVER IT!! He tells me he is bored and the food is gross (everything we have made he said he likes). He needs to lose the weight more than I do and has astronmically high blood pressure, but he also thinks he is fine and doesnt seem to care. I know I cant make him, but I just want him to want it.

I heard a good piece of advice from someone in my meeting today, she had lost 50lbs and the leader asked how long she had been a Weight Watcher. Her response was something I will probably hold onto forever. She said that when you tell someone how much weight you lost, people's first question is "How long did it take?" she that time will always go by it doesnt matter how long it takes it will slowly come off who cares how much each time as long as you are losing. Of course it was much more eloquent coming out of her mouth, but she was right. Who cares if its 2.2 or .2.

Day 12

So far so good, I am finding it harder to get to the gym because I am so tired lately, maybe I need a multi vitamin to pick up some of the slack. Rest assured I still went to the gym and kicked my butt. Does anyone else find it harder to be on the treadmill than the elliptical? I tried to jog and got as far as 2 mins and wanted to die, lol. But I find it refreshing that I keep going regardless.

I also meant to mention I overheard this woman in my meeting last week talking about an amazing webite that list point values next to all her recipes and I went and checked it out this week and it is amazing! So I thought I would share the love with all of you. So please go check out http://www.skinnytaste.com/.

Great Page for Free Layouts!!

http://hotbliggityblog.com/backgrounds.php

Day 7- 243.2lbs

Ok so there it is world, the heaviest I have ever been. I went to my first Weight Watcher Meeting on the new diet today and boy was it packed. I cant really judge, there I was in the long line of people joining to start their new years resolution as well. It went well had a great time playing with all the PointsPlus items I bought the calculator and the Essential Member Kit (3 month Journal, Complete Food Companion, Dining Out Companion). I dont think I will use the journal or the calculator that much since I have the WW Iphone App., it also has all the foods and restaurants there as well, but sometimes you just need the tactile gratifiation of the books.
I also bought 3 WW Cookbooks (Annual Recipes for Success- 2008, 2009, 2010) online a week ago, 2 have just come in and I cant wait to try some new recipes. I am also much happier to have bread back in my life. I figured I didnt lose anything during the week I cut out carbs that I am just going to do it the WW way and at least I will feel more satisfied and less apt to fall off the wagon :)
Still loving the new gym and am really excited about this new program.


Toodles All

Bathroom Stalls

I was at a restaurant today and realize something while using the restroom. I want to get to a wait where I dont curse the creator of the bathroom stall doors that swing in. Do you guys know which ones I am talking about? The ones where you have to press yourself against against the wall or back by the toilet to open and close the door. Yes those are the ones, and I promise by the end of the year I will not hate the man (yes I am convinced it was a man) who created them.

Staring at a Crunch Bar

I really want to eat this Nestle Crunch Bar so bad right now. Someone help me!!!

DAY 5

I kinda missed the blog and I was only away for two day apparently this place is growing on me and I havent even done this for that long.

So Day 3 Hubby and I went and researched gyms in our area and we looked at both LifeStyle Rx and Livermore Valley Tennis Club. I really like Lifestyle Rx because they had a nutrition program with personal training included but it was kinda pricy at $1400 and this was in addition to the $161/month for two of us.
Livermore Valley Tennis Club this place was huge almost like a campus and had a ton of programs for little ones which I knew would be more our thing in a year or two. Granted LVTC didnt have the nutrition class, but they did have personal training so we decided that was ok and they have 3 pools and are cheaper at $155!!! So we signed up!!

As we were signing up one of the personal trainers was checking his book and happened to overhear me asking what the personal training costs were and he told us there was this great program called A NEW YOU. Its 10wk program where it is a 4-1 personal trainer, they go over nutrition and go through different exercises. So we signed up at a much better rate by the way-$325. So here is to a NEW ME and a NEW HUSBAND lol! Im scared, this guy is going to kick my ass. We start 1/24 wish me luck...


As for today- I am feeling a little bored with my meals. I am tired of turkey and salads and I am really craving carbs and sugar. I went and worked out on the elliptical today, did 2 miles in 30mins which I guess is a good start. I felt really good after and came home and Hubby cooked a fantastic meal. I just sometimes wish there was a whole magic pill type thing for weight....

Maple Bourbon Glazed Turkey Cutlets

I will try and post some recipes to hopefully inspire healthy cooking to the readers. Let me first start off by saying I am super picky and 2 my husband does all of the cooking as I have a great way of ruining everything I touch. I really should go on the Worlds Worst Cook Show on Food Network. Anyways in hopes of trying to keep my husband excited about dieting we have picked a few new recipes to try. Here is Day 1 of new recipes maybe I could turn this into some sort of Julie/Julia thing, lol.

1. Maple Glazed Turkey Cutlets
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1 1/2 lbs turkey cutlets

Glaze 

1 cup maple syrup (lowfat)
2/3 cup bourbon
1 teaspoon pepper

The glaze was super sweet it needed something, maybe orange juice to cut through all the sweet or even chipotle for some heat. It was just too sweet and missing a note of something, but it wasnt going to keep me from eating my turkey...I love turkey cutlets

Freeze Dried Fruit??

I have always loved freeze dried strawberries (like the ones in Special K-Red Berries), I am a big texture person and love the crunchy. Well I started buying the strawberry packets rather than picking out the strawberries from the cereal box and upsetting my family. Well apparently I am not the only one who loves this stuff, because they have a ton of different freeze dried fruit in the grocery stores now. I just tried Apple from Sensible Foods and they are REALLY good! A big step up from apple chips which are chewy and remind me of something stale. I also bought a bag of the tropical blend which I will bring as a snack for work.

I also went researching online to see if I could find more "flavors" and was in shock out how many are made!! Apples, Cherries, Bananas, Strawberries, Raspberries (little too tart), Pineapple, Apricots, Mango, Peaches, Kiwi, Pears, and for you veggie fans they have just as many vegetable ones as they do fruit. I will be buying a bunch and will report back!

Websites I found:

Just Tomatoes, etc!

Today's Farm

Nuts Online

Day 2

So far I am still on a good wave, still ready and willing to kick this thing in the ass. Right now I am doing the Phase 1 of the South Beach Diet (no carbs, no sugars). However, I slightly modifed it due to the fat that I dont eat a big enoug variety of veggies I incorporated fruit. So I allow myself fruit and dairy, but no sugar or carbs at this point. I know this isnt the ideal plan, but for me I need to give them up cold turkey and then I can slowly incorporate the good ones back in, allowing me a few of my favorites here and there. After that I will be on the Weight Watcher Power Points. I have done the old point plan before, but it will be fun to learn anew program, plus I hear fruits are zero points and I couldnt be more excited about that!!

Day 1
Breakfast- 4 pieces of Center Cut Bacon, BabyBell Light Cheese, and a cup of grapes and glass of milk
Lunch- Deli Sliced Turkey with 100 calorie packet of cheese
Dinner- Buffalo Turkey Burgers and Salad
I KNOW, I KNOW I NEED MORE VEGGIES!! But the only type I eat is lettuce.... that is one of my problems with weight.

Day 2
Breakfast- Slept in...
Lunch- Leftover Turkey Burger with grapes
Dinner- Maple Bourban Glazed Turkey Cutlets with Ceaser Salad

New Years Resolutions?

What were all your new years resolutions?

Mine-
1. Lose weight. - I need to come up with a goal or mini goals. Especially finding ways to reward myself that dont include food, that is always my down fall.

2. Have more sex!!!- My husband works graveyard so we never get to see each other. So we need to find more time to working this in.

New Year, New Beginning, New Start...

Why hello to anyone reading this I guess I should start with a little bit about myself. I have never done the blogging thing or anytime of weight loss journey journal and have never been one to share my weight with anyone, not even my mother, but if I am going to keep myself motivated I need to put everything on the line. I have been overweight/fat for most of my life, for as long a I can remember I have been dieting. I remember counting calories in a notebook in 5th grade. I would always lose about 20lbs then stop and gain back 30. I did WW about 4 years ago lost, 40lbs and then stopped and gained back 60-70lbs over the last few years. I recently got married and went on the South Beach Diet a month before my wedding and lost 20lbs, we went to an all-inclusive resort for our honeymoon and this was bad news for my waistline. I always start off great and then find that I self sabotage myself by saying "OH I lost xxlbs, I can afford to eat 15 donuts!!" So here is to sticking to it!

So why now you ask? Well the hubby and I have decided that we want to start REALLY trying to have a child this year and I just want to lose some of this weight to help that process, as well as, making it easier during pregnancy. I know its is kind of backwards to lose it BEFORE having a kid, but I feel its best to get the practices in order and will help lose it when our bundle of joy arrives.

So here it is, here are the stats:
I am now 243lbs (eekk)
Height- 5' 8"
I wear a size 16 in jeans (uncomfortably, 18 comfortably)

Hopefully I'll have a few interesting things to say from time to time about my weight loss journey, trying to acclimate to being a wife, and trying to get knocked up :) so check back every once in awhile and see what I have to say or bitch about.